


The House That Built Me

by isthisenoughorcanwegohigher



Category: Captain Marvel (2019)
Genre: another song inspired fic?, i wrote this immediately after seeing Captain Marvel, it's more likely than you think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-11-28 08:55:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18206297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isthisenoughorcanwegohigher/pseuds/isthisenoughorcanwegohigher
Summary: Maybe it doesn't matter what she remembers. Maybe what matters the most is how she feels now.





	The House That Built Me

**Author's Note:**

> _I thought if I could touch this place or feel it_   
>  _This brokenness inside me might start healing_   
>  _Out here it’s like I’m someone else_   
>  _I thought that maybe I could find myself_   
>  _If I could just come in I swear I’ll leave_   
>  _Won’t take nothing but a memory_

Carol stepped out onto the pavement, hands twitching at her sides. Her memory was patchy at best, flickering in and out worse than her comms when she was out of range. Still, at least she had them now, her memories.

Seeing them felt like seeing a familiar dream. She squeezed her hands, hoping the physical pressure would trigger something to fall into place. 

All of this should be something that made her feel. But all she felt was blank, empty. It seemed that not even this, coming back to the place she’d trained to be a pilot, could fix the broken parts of her.

Carol sighed, shoving her hands back into her jacket pockets.

“This is pointless,” she sighed, turning to face Maria. “Whatever happened, I--I don’t belong here anymore.”

“That’s not true,” Maria said, her eyes flashing. “Whether you remember it or not, this was your home. It was our home.”

Carol bit her lip, trying to fight the smile off her face. Despite how happy Maria made her feel, now wasn’t the time to be smiling. 

Then again, maybe it was a good sign that she felt like smiling. Without her memories, this place would just be another air field, another military base, another plane that she didn’t have a hope in hell of flying.

But there was, even with the flickering memories, something familiar about this. Something that, like Maria said, felt like home.

“I don’t know what to do.” The admission was torn from her before she could stop it. Carol bit her lip and studied Maria from the corner of her eyes. “I don’t know how to protect this planet, and I don’t know who I am, and I don’t know how to fix it.”

“I don’t know how to help,” Maria whispered, her tone soft as she watched Carol. “I wish I did.”

“You’re helping plenty,” said Carol. She turned to fully face Maria, shoving her hands as deep in her pockets as they could get. “’S not your fault I got lost in this world. Certainly not your fault I forgot who I am.”

“No, I should have told you not to go, I should have gone in your place, I should have stopped you, I should have--”

“There was nothing you could have done to stop me. I may not remember what happened, but I know who I am now, and if I’m anything like the person I was here on Earth, I was stubborn as hell.” Carol met Maria’s gaze with a fiery look. Whatever she couldn’t remember about the woman in front of her, she could remember twice the feeling of what she was missing. Maria was important to her, and Carol would not let her blame herself for what had happened.

Maria chuckled drily. “That’s true.”

“Stubborn?”

“As hell.”

Carol laughed delightedly, surprised by how warm she felt despite the chill in the air. Maybe she didn’t need all of her memories, as long as she had the feeling that no matter where she went, she could still come back home.


End file.
